Players Who Criticised Mass Effect 3 Ending Will Be Unable To Import Saves To Andromeda

Players who are looking to bring their Mass Effect 3 universe into Andromeda when it launches next year will be excited to learn that they can “get fucked”, according to BioWare’s Aaron Flynn.

Using something Flynn calls “a clause in the EULA, try reading it next time”, anybody who tries to import a Mass Effect 3 save file will be forced to wait while BioWare scours their social media and forum accounts for any negative opinions regarding the ending of the game.

If a player does not have social media accounts, they can provide the names and phone numbers of several referees who BioWare will call and interview.

If this sounds stressful or over the top, don’t worry — BioWare says that the differences between the Andromeda experience of players who had “the right opinions” on Mass Effect 3 and “those other people” will only be cosmetic.

“For example, players who enjoyed the ending of Mass Effect 3 will start their game with skin,” said Flynn.

“Everyone else will have their model of Ryder replaced by a horrific skeleton creature who is constantly screaming in pain.”

“All the other models will be similarly screaming as well,” Flynn elaborated. “They’ll be screaming things like ‘you did this to me with your terrible opinions’ and ‘if only you were able to appreciate art’. They’ll scream that sort of thing as they bleed and thrash around, following you everywhere, screaming endlessly.”

“We’re very excited.”