Local Dad Resigns Himself To Buying One Of Whatever The Fuck Nintendo Is Doing Now

Local father of three Jamie Evans has today begun preparing himself for a visit to his nearest games store, where he will hand over cash and get one of whatever the hell Nintendo just announced.

Evans, who has no memory of opening the Nintendo Direct livestream or what was announced during it, blinked suddenly as the stream finished and he realised he was, once again, already looking up prices online.

“Trust Nintendo to come up with something like this,” chuckled Evans to himself in the office. “It’s always Nintendo who do this kind of thing.”

“Don’t get me wrong, I know it’s dumb, but I’m sure Nintendo know what they’re doing,” explained Evans, more loudly so that his co-worker would hear.

Although many are wondering how Nintendo can possibly justify whatever magic bullshit they just cooked up, Evans says he isn’t worried.

“Absolutely day one for me. I’ll be picking up a few for sure,” he confirmed. “Should be great for the kids. Teach them about creativity, and, you know, coins.”