Developer’s Creative Vision Helped Along By Huge Amount Of Cash

A game developer will be able to fully realise their creative vision today, thanks to a huge cash injection from a massive corporation as a result of signing a draconian, secretive exclusivity agreement.

“We’re really excited to finally be able to deliver on everything we wanted to do, and also to get a shit-ton of cash,” explained the thrilled developer.

“This is going to give the best result for gamers, and also for our bank account.”

The agreement means that the game will be limited to one platform only, preventing the corporation’s rivals from making any money from the game.

“We weighed up our options,” explained the game developer. “And in the end, speaking as an artist, there was only one choice — the company that wanted to pay us more money.”

“It’s great that our creative visions were aligned on this one. There’s a great vibe here. A great vibe. I think they really get what we’re about as a company: profit.”

Leaked images of the agreement have surfaced online, revealing that it is entirely just an oversized novelty cheque with “loads of money” written on it. But both the game developer and the massive corporation have remained coy when questioned by journalists.

“Creativity is a nebulous thing. Who is to say what is art, and what is not? It’s the classic struggle, isn’t it — burning with an artistic passion that you’re unable to realise because nobody was willing to pay you cold, hard, cash.”

“We don’t want to put a price on art. But we did. And then we paid it.”

“This is a real win for everyone, unless you own the rival platform.”