Konami “Doesn’t Know Anyone Called Hideo Kojima”, Not Sure Why You Would Bring It Up

Only days after banning Hideo Kojima from attending the extremely relevant Game Awards, publisher Konami have now announced they’re “not even sure who that is”.

“Hideo Kojima? Doesn’t ring a bell,” explained Konami’s PR representative, as they stood in front of a poster of Metal Gear Solid 5: The Phantom Pain with the words ‘A Hideo Kojima Game’ still quite legible under a hastily-added strip of duct tape.

“I’m sure I’d remember somebody like that working here. I have a very good memory and I’m telling you, I don’t know anybody by that name.”

Konami’s PR representative halted the interview briefly to direct the loading of several boxes marked ‘HIDEO KOJIMA OFFICE CONTENTS’ into a nearby truck.

“Nobody named Hideo Kojima has ever worked here, or been banned from returning to here on pain of death.”

“Frankly I’m a little offended that you would even ask.”